What does a relationship that makes you feel comfortable look like?

Relationships that are truly comfortable go against human nature as little as possible.

In other words, the more relaxed and happy you are in a relationship, the less stress you feel, and the more you can be yourself in front of the other person, the better the relationship will make you feel.

1. Both lovers and friends

Have you ever heard of the saying that friends tend to last longer than lovers?

This is not only because love will give rise to a lot of negative emotions, but also because the role of friends is more equal, there is no difference between men and women or inside and outside the division of labor, a strong sense of similarity, interaction points and common topics will be more, talk about the world, nothing to say, naturally, will also tap into the other side of the more interesting side.

Therefore, the two people who are really comfortable together, basically that is a couple, but also friends. Can always do each other’s support, have something to say, have to play, will not be bored, more not easily bored.

2, have a sense of boundaries, do not deprive each other of private rights

When two people’s relationship develops to completely lose the sense of boundaries, basically also in the countdown for the breakup.

Human beings have the right to seek freedom of soul and privacy space, like breathing as innate. When this right is deprived of, even under the guise of “love”, sooner or later there will be unbearable.

Love is not a bondage, intimacy is not necessary to deprive the freedom of will.

3, boys willing to bow down, girls willing to understand

In a relationship, in fact, the best state is: boys do not want to make girls angry, so willing to bow down;

And girls are willing to understand, know how to stop, will not be unreasonable.

The essence behind this state, in fact, happens to be a kind of demand for mutual catering: most girls in the relationship of emotional, than right or wrong, they care more about the boyfriend to bring their own feelings. Therefore, they need their boyfriend’s good attitude and way of dealing with it, and when they get it, they are calm.

Most guys, on the other hand, think in a straight line and care more about whether the problem itself is worth the fuss between the two, whose problem it is, and where it went wrong. So, they are often unsure and even think that girls are making a big deal out of it. In this regard, they need the girls’ understanding and sympathy.

4, will solve the problem, rather than derive quarrels

It is often said that it is easy to love each other and difficult to get along with each other – this sentence is blunt, in fact, it is easy to love each other, but it is difficult to communicate.

After all, two people together can not not disagree, disagreements resolved, is a shortcut to closer relations; resolve bad, is the destruction of the dagger of love.

Good communication is to determine the direction of the relationship between the two people the most important thing.

Communication is wrong, and then the deep feelings will be with the constant quarrels and misunderstandings wear out; communication is correct, even if the other party has serious character defects, can be in your correct guidance to get rescued, and perhaps more dependent on you.

The way to verify whether the communication between two people is proper is to observe the results of each communication. If at first clearly calm and peaceful, three words but after the outbreak of quarrels, it must be the communication link out of the problem; but if every time to calmly end, and reach a consensus, this communication method is considered to be a real problem solving.

5, can seek common ground while reserving differences, respect each other’s preferences

As I said before, the most important way to make each other easy around you is to let him maximize their own.

Of course, this “do it yourself” premise, do not need you to bend over backwards, more about the principle of transcending the moral boundaries, more just mutual respect, tolerance of different, encourage hobbies so simple.

Therefore, the girls to compare themselves with the game, for the boys is a kind of disrespect for the oppression; and the boys put the pragmatic spirit of the girls to dress up, the same is also a kind of selfish sobriety.

Respect each other’s preferences, rather than using their own aesthetics to judge the right and wrong preferences, and even try to change each other’s hobbies.

6, empathy, can do each other’s emotional support and backbone

Why is empathy so important in love? Because in this world, the vast majority of people can not really think for others, if there is an exception, the exception must be extraordinary with your relationship.

Therefore, there is a general rule in love: “Encouragement” is always better than “lecturing” to make the other person improve.

Because the former can make each other feel loved, be hurt, be the only; and the latter is more like a high hanging type of joke, even if the other side so change, the driving force is not love, but gambling.

7, not forced not kidnapping, completely rely on the initiative

Whether a relationship will give people pressure, depending on whether the other party in this relationship you have too many requirements.

Once the phenomenon of too much force in the relationship, more or less will produce the shackles of emotional kidnapping. For example, love is too full will require each other everything, too much input will expect each other the same return, the commission will hope that the other side will be grateful – all this seems to be the aftermath of too much force, and in the view of the other side, are your high standards and strict requirements, can not achieve to withstand your sadness and disappointment and even blame.

Therefore, in the relationship, accept each other to be greater than change each other. It is not that there is no need to change, but because an adult’s perception has been stereotyped, it is too difficult to change and the probability is very small. If you can’t tolerate and accept, many times the hardest thing is only yourself.

8, good character, good temper, with you together will not be scared

Scientific studies show that up to 70% of girls who are broken up with, the biggest reason is because of bad character.
Compared to the external face value, character is more like the soul of the face value.

As the relationship deepens and the other person gets to know you, personality determines how happy the other person is with you on a daily basis.

Most people want to be gentle, healed, understood and tolerated in an intimate relationship, rather than being on edge every day like an ancestor, lest they do something wrong.

In other words, no one does not want to be treated well, and the reason to fall in love is precisely because you want to find a harbor in the noisy world, if this harbor does not exist, but also all the gunfire, even the most tolerant people will choose to leave.

Sometimes, regrettably, it is not that he does not want to love you, but you personally will push him away.

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